amen
(Source: woistdaswirgeblieben, via goodjobtonightmoshpitgirls)
(Source: grandiosemelody, via simplelittlebandthings)
Do you think animals ever go “fuck my life?” I think that’s probably all they think about other than food.
(via glitterandnightmares)
(Source: thecubantimelord, via fuckyeahbandbuffalo)
SO THIS GUY WAS TRYING TO HIT ON THIS GIRL IN MY CLASS TODAY AND THIS HAPPENED
Posted on May 15, 2013 with 170,821 notes x reblog this
- Douche: hey
- Nice girl:
- Douche: HEY
- Nice girl: what?
- Douche: you know, there should be a warning sign on my dick
- Nice girl: excuse me?
- Douche: yeah, it should say choking hazard lol *hi fives bros*
- Nice girl: isn't that a label they put on small objects?
Things I Say While Driving
Posted on May 15, 2013 with 258,002 notes x reblog this
- Me: What the fuck are you doing. What. The fuck. Are you doing.
- Me: NICE BLINKER ASSHOLE.
- Me: Why the FUCK are we not even going the speed limit. Why.
- Me: I AM GOING TEN MILES PER HOUR OVER THE SPEED LIMIT WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT
- Me: Shit is that a cop? No.
- Me: Shit THAT is a cop.
- Me: /dinosaur screams/
- Me: THE LIGHT IS GREEN. QUIT HOLDIN YOUR DICK AND GO!
- Boy: spell me
- Girl: M-E
- Boy: you forgot the D
- Girl: there's no D in me.
- Boy: not yet
